I’m a little disappointed that John McCain decided to show up for the Presidential debate. Â I was looking forward to watching Obama debate an empty chair. Â I’m sure the chair would have just sat there, but it is better than watching McCain lie there.
I recently read some stuff written by Michelle Malkin. Nasty stuff. Hateful stuff. I won’t even link to it because the only reason she isn’t denounced as a hateful racist is that she is, you know, like not white.
Which brings me to a different point altogether. Am I the only person who thinks it odd that the de facto spokesman for white supremacists in America is a Filipino woman? The daughter of immigrants no less.
Wow. Maybe women, minorities and immigrants really are taking ALL the jobs.
I had an appointment today with a dermatologist. My GP seems to think that my multitude of moles need to have an eye kept on them. So off I went today for my first visit.
I knew that the Doctor would want to have a look at my back and legs, so I wore shorts to make it an easier inspection. Turns out that they were gonna want a more complete look than that.
I wasn’t prepared for that.
They told me I could keep my boxers on, but I would need to shed the rest of my clothing. Well, this particular pair of boxers has a nasty habit of coming open at the fly. Most of them don’t, but this pair does. Everyone has a pair of undies that require them to make discreet adjustments now and again. I wore my pair to this appointment.
So after I disrobe I am handed one of those hospital gowns. I breathe a small sigh of relief, no matter that these things are pathetic attempts to maintain a bit of modesty, at least my randomly open barn door is going to be shielded.
So in come the doctor and her resident. The doctor looks old enough to be my grandma. The resident looks young enough for me to have babysat her.
Great.
After the introductions, we began the exam. Turns out that the teensy-weensy gown is somehow in the way. I’m asked to take it off.
Fantastic.
So, off it comes. I fixed my gaze steadily on their eyes when they addressed me, the wall cabinetry the rest of the time. The exam went amazingly fast. I was told that though I have a lot of freckles and moles, none seem to be grounds for concern. They were gone in no more than 3 minutes.
They breezed out telling me that I could leave as soon as I got dressed. Only then did I have the courage to look down at the problematic barn door.
I still haven’t rounded up my horses.
Here in South Carolina, our politicians aren’t so much corrupt as just hard partyers.
COLUMBIA, S.C. - South Carolina Treasurer Thomas Ravenel, a former real estate developer who became a rising political star after his election last year, was indicted Tuesday on federal cocaine charges.
The millionaire is accused of buying less than 500 grams of the drug to share with other people in late 2005, U.S. Attorney Reggie Lloyd said. Ravenel, 44, is charged with distribution of cocaine, which carries a maximum sentence of 20 years in prison.
In South Carolina almost everybody is Republican. Aiken County (in which I reside) is one of the most consistently Republican voting counties nationwide. My neighbor, who is in charge of the elections around here, told me once that if Jesus ran as a Democrat here, he would lose by 20 points. I believe him.
The reason I believe that most people around here are Republican is not because of ideology or self-interest. I think that voting (R) is actually against the interests of this predominantly middle class area. I think they vote for the GOP becasue they think they will actually get a Grand Ole Party. Hookers and cocaine and champagne to pour on the coked-up hookers. I think Thomas Ravenel proves my point.
My lovely wife had an evening on the town with her girlfriends last weekend. As is always the case when women get together, they talked about men. Amongst this group, i always seem to come out smelling like a rose.
Now, granted, Marilyn could be exaggerating the superlatives heaped upon me. Okay, myabe heaped isn’t the right word, either. But I seem to get positive comments. And more than once I have been told that the words “I need to find a man like James” have been uttered during these discussions.
It’s tough being the ideal husband, let me tell you. I have an extraordinarily tough schedule just fitting in all these things that make me such a wonderful guy. But to help out all those guys that aren’t awesome like me, I will give you a list of the things I do to be so laudable.
That’s the list. Four things. Four.
So what I don’t get, is it really that hard to find a guy that can handle those four things? Those things really aren’t that much harder than just existing. I would’ve thought those four things were baseline and to be impressive you had to go way past that. Turns out to be Mr. Wonderful, all you have to be is decent. I find that a bit shocking. But I will take it.
I wonder what they would think if they knew I wash and fold my own laundry and make my bed? Am I Mr. Perfect yet?
The latest from The Onion: Terror, Drugs, Poverty Redouble Efforts Against U.S.
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This just trips me out. I’m not sure why.
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How can you beat a headline like this?
Babysitter Swaps Dead Child With Similar Child Before Parents Get Home
Short answer: You can’t. Take a listen.
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I share my idea on how to become history’s most popular president.
Links:
Michelle Malone Chronicles
Fueled By Ramen
Panic! At The Disco
George Bush
Email me: jaslusher AT gmail DOT com